Regular Guardian readers and residents of Brighton and Hove will enjoy the Julie Burchill Random Recycler:
"Where I live, in the newly created city of Brighton and Hove, bourgeoisie a lividly thin, pale, credible young thing (moi) wrote in the Face solely to create jobs for a bunch of finger-wagging no-marks."
It’s very accurate so, more often than not, it doesn’t make any sense.