Obey Day

I feel I must apoligise to American readers for my earlier entreaties for a happy May Day.

Little did I realise that although May Day began in America as a celebration of workers’ rights, there have been attempts since the 1930s to disassociate the day from those pinko commie scum.

The latest attempt was made this year by George W.Bush who would like to rename May 1st Loyalty Day.

You can’t argue with that now, can you? If you do then I guess that would be disloyal.

Such clever use of language would seem to indicate that some people have been boning up on Orwell’s Appendix to 1984.

The Liberty Committee, for instance, are legislating for the United States to withdraw its membership of the UN. They call this piece of legislation the "American Sovereignty Restoration Act".

If I were a politician, I think I would give all my legislation titles like The "Every Time You Vote Against This, A Kitten Dies" Act or The "Think Of The Children! Won’t Somebody Please Think Of The Children!" Act.

For service above and beyond the cause of Newspeak, though, you can’t beat the USA PATRIOT Act. Not only does it have a name that’s straight off Big Brother’s whiteboard, it’s also an acronym.

I don’t know who comes up with that stuff but I have a sneaking suspicion that it’s the same people who gave us "friendly fire" and "collateral damage".

Have you published a response to this? :

Previously on this day

18 years ago I wrote åsa & malin proudly present...

Local Flash heroes Kerb have relaunched their website.

18 years ago I wrote The World According to Student Bloopers

Students say the funniest things: